Red Light on the Wedding Night is the 3rd episode of Season 2 of Gilmore Girls.

Synopsis

During a wild bachelorette party thrown by Sookie (Melissa McCarthy), Lorelai (Lauren Graham) makes an impulsive phone call to Rory's (Alexis Bledel) dad Christopher (guest star David Sutcliffe) and sadly realizes that Max (Scott Cohen) is not the man for her.

Plot

Rory and Lorelai are busy tasting wedding cakes and cannot decide which one is the best. The big day is two weeks from tomorrow and this is a crucial decision. The only thing to do is to keep eating cake. Rory then shows her mom some sample invitations with random poetry quotes for the cover. Lorelai picks something by Mussolini just as Rory expresses a bit of guilt about sampling free cake when Sookie is already baking one for the wedding. But ultimately Lorelai and Rory decide that ethics are completely over-rated when it comes to cake. At home, Lorelai is looking over Kirk's photographs. Apparently, it is his hobby and he would like to shoot the photos for the wedding. She agrees but only if he accepts lunch and the cost of the film as payment. Deal, Kirk leaves, and Lorelai asks Max to stay for the whole weekend while his apartment is being painted. Think of it as a trial run. After all, he shall be moving in soon enough. Meanwhile; Rory and Dean are contemplating what to do that night. All the movies in the theater suck, so they are stuck with Monty Python again. But this time Dean refuses to speak in an English accent all night. Then Rory reveals that Lorelai wants them all to go out on a double date this weekend. Dean is down with it, except for the fact that it is his and Rory's anniversary. Rory disagrees. It is the 24th. But Dean points out that they have a new anniversary, the 6th because that is when they got back together. So, what is the happy couple to do? Celebrate two anniversaries.

When Max makes a real dinner for the Gilmore girls, they can hardly believe their eyes. Nor did they ever know that they had a broiler. After dinner, it is movie time. Lorelai and Rory can practically quote the whole thing while poor Max is shushed every time he speaks. Finally, he and Lorelai retire upstairs and it does seem kind of weird, for both girls. Lorelai cannot sleep a wink and heads right into Rory's room to talk. She just cannot deal with having a boy in her room and thinks she and Rory should clear the air. Rory is fine with it all, but it is clear that Lorelai is not. Life as she knows it will soon be over. Yeah, but is Lorelai happy? That is what matters most. Lorelai says she is but then falls asleep in Rory's bed. At the diner in the morning, Lorelai, Rory and Max plan to eat together. Luke is ordered to be nice and he overdoes it, until Max needs extra time to order. He does not know what he wants. It throws the whole morning diner world order into complete chaos. Suddenly, Luke spots a county work crew installing Stars Hollow's very first metered traffic light and cross walk. Luke is outraged. He was not informed about any of this. Taylor insists that it is for the public safety and there is nothing that Luke can do about it. Lorelai comes outside to sympathize and asks if Luke is coming to her wedding. He blows off the question claiming he has calls to make about that damn traffic light.

On their double date, Lorelai and Rory rush off for ice cream after a huge dinner. That leaves Dean to give Max the information on the quirks on the Gilmore girls. And there are quite a few. He lists as many as he can think of in a few minutes time and it is just the tip of the iceberg. Poor Max, he has no idea what he is really up against. Back at home, Max and Lorelai go inside and leave the other lovebirds on the porch. Max expresses concern over how long they get to be outside together. What are the rules? Because once Max is living there, he needs to know what to do. What if he catches them making out on the couch? Um, they are teenagers, they are allowed to make out. Okay, what if Rory comes home drunk? Lorelai knows that would never happen. But if it did, Lorelai would handle it. So, Max has absolutely no role in Rory's life. Heis quite upset about it. Lorelai explains that Rory is all grown up; she does not need anything from Max. Ouch. How is this relationship going to work? How do they combine two lives? Max wants to have more to do in the Gilmore house than make dinner and answer the phone. Clearly, Max and Lorelai have a lot to figure out, and they had better do it soon. When the light is installed outside the diner, Taylor gives everyone a lesson on how to use it. But Luke points out that there has never been an accident at that crosswalk in Stars Hollow. Unfortunately, it is too late to remove it.

Sookie and Lorelai have other things on their minds, namely a bachelorette party, at a drag club. Before they leave, Luke puts in another two cents about the pointlessness of weddings and other such related ceremonies. And it seems what he is saying might be making sense to Lorelai. As the girls try to get into the club, the bouncer almost prevents Rory from getting in. But Lorelai works her magic and everyone gets in to see a bunch of men dressed as women. But the real horror is that Michel has taken the liberty of inviting Emily. She reminisces about what it was like the week before she got married and how madly in love she and Richard were. But that is not all. She would get out of bed every night and put on her dress and marvel at how safe she felt. This sentiment makes Lorelai feel all of the sudden not so safe. And while others at the table get all mushy, Lorelai gets up from the table to make a phone call. But she does not call Max; she calls Christopher to tell him she is getting married. Christopher only wants to know two things? Is he worthy of Lorelai and Rory and what is his CD collection like? This makes it clear that Max is not the one for Lorelai. Lorelai is totally hung-over in the morning and annoyed that Max is not so. He comes by the inn because he needs a set of the house keys, which Lorelai keeps forgetting to make for him. Should he be reading something into this? Max loses it for a second and tells Lorelai that she has got to think about someone other than herself for two minutes a day. Ouch.

At home, Rory mentions that Christopher called and she knows about the phone call. Rory thinks it is kind of weird and wants the scoop. Why did Lorelai pretend to call Max and then call Christopher? Lorelai blames the Long Island Ice Tea. But what is the real problem here? Lorelai insists everything is fine. She goes outside to find Luke bringing her a chuppah that he made himself. (A chuppah is a structure with four posts holding a wooden platform, it is used when a couple gets married and represented the coming together of people under one roof.) So, did Luke really mean all those things he said about marriage? People can evolve together, right? Luke says it can happen, but only if you find the right person. Who is that right person anyway? The next thing you know, Lorelai is in Rory's room frantically packing for a road trip. Wait a second, she cannot go on a road trip, there is a wedding this weekend. Rory finds out that Lorelai cannot get married because she never tried on her dress every night. And that is all Rory needs to hear. A road trip it is! The girls get in the car and get behind the wheel. But they do not get very far. That damn new traffic light!

Starring

Lauren Graham as Lorelai Gilmore
Alexis Bledel as Rory Gilmore
Melissa McCarthy as Sookie St. James
Yanic Truesdale as Michel Gerard
Scott Patterson as Luke Danes
Jared Padalecki as Dean Forester
and Kelly Bishop as Emily Gilmore

Recurring cast

Liz Torres as Miss Patty
Michael Winters as Taylor Doose
Sally Struthers as Babette Dell
Sean Gunn as Kirk Gleason
David Sutcliffe as Christopher Hayden

Guest starring

Ted Rooney as Morey Dell
Linda Porter as Fran Weston
Scott Cohen as Max Medina

Co-Starring

Lee Reherman as The Doorman
Adam Selkowitz as Daniel
Norma Michaels as Mrs. Lanahan
Alan Luzietti as Judy Garland
Brian Palmetto as Mae West
Maximilliana as Marylin Monroe
Scott Kaske as Bette Davis
Michael Harrington as Gwen Stefani
Bijoux Deluxe as Uma Thurman
Jazzmun as Janet Jackson

Quotes

Lorelai – Hey, sir, make way for Rory. That's it, one name. Internationally-known international supermodel
Sookie – She's very big in Germany
Lorelai – Ja, ja, with the Lederhosen and such
I feel like crap on toast
—Michel

Trivia

  • When they convince the bouncer at the bar to let Rory in, they say she was a world famous model. In real life, Alexis Bledel was a model when she was still in high school, and ended up traveling to Tokyo, Milan, New York and Los Angeles.
  • Stars Hollow gets its very first traffic light.

Music

get happy | JUDY GARLAND
true | SPANDAU BALLET
church of the poison mind | CULTURE CLUB
spring releasedGRANT LEE PHILLIPS

Photos

Gilmorisms

MUSIC

LITERATURE

FILM

POP CULTURE

Lorelai – Well, it ain't Guy Fawkes Day.
Lorelai – Okay. Um… "What is love? It is the morning and the evening star." Ugh.
RorySinclair Lewis.
Lorelai – Sinclair "Sappy" Lewis.
LorelaiByron and Lewis, together again.
Lorelai – "We have buried the putrid corpse of liberty." Perfect!
RoryMussolini it is.
LorelaiIf eating cake is wrong, I don't want to be right.
Lorelai – Take me upstairs and see if you can get me into Mensa.
Lorelai – Well, we are Electra Woman and Dyna Girl.
Max – He's the middle child.
Lorelai – Poor Jan!
Miss Patty – Well, Sinjin was a let-down the second time, but he was my Burton and I was his Taylor. Just wish I could've found a little Mike Todd there in the middle.
Christopher – So is he worthy?
Lorelai – Is anyone?
ChristopherBono, maybe? Brian Ferry
Sookie(describing her hangover) Like a baseball the size of a cantaloupe in your head.
Lorelai – Good one.
Sookie – What?
Lorelai – 'Cause a baseball can only be one size, so it's a Yogi Berra type thing.
Lorelai – And people can evolve together don't you think?
Luke – Maybe.
LorelaiYoko and John Lennon did. They got closer and closer as the years went by. At the end they even had the same face.
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.