I'm A Kayak, Hear Me Roar is the 15th episode of Season 7 on CW drama Gilmore Girls.


Lorelai breaks the news about her marriage to Emily, and Mitchum brings Logan and Rory out for a birthday dinner, after which Logan finds out that his newly acquired company is about to be sued.


At Friday night dinner, Lorelai works up the courage to tell her parents about the break-up of her marriage, but is derailed by their argument over the healthy meals and no-alcohol policy Emily has instituted to help Richard recover from his heart attack. Lorelai enlists Sookie to bring Richard healthy but delicious meals, then helps Emily organize Richard's business affairs. Over a shared bottle of scotch, Lorelai finally tells her mother about the breakup of her marriage. When she finally does, she encounters sympathy from Emily, much to her surprise.

Rory surprises Logan with a Gilmore-ish themed party for his 25th birthday to show him that birthdays can be fun – this includes ice skating, piñatas and other activities based on the themes that Lorelai had used for Rory's past birthday parties – as opposed to the Huntzbergers' way of throwing birthday bashes. Rory attends an awkward birthday dinner for Logan with Mitchum Huntzberger, who asks her to help him steer Logan in the right direction. Later, before going skating, Logan receives a call from his business partner informing him that the patents of the online company he purchased are invalid. He decides quickly not to tell Rory about this. Also, Luke shares his home with Liz, T.J. and their baby daughter while their house is being fumigated.


Lauren Graham as Lorelai Gilmore
Alexis Bledel as Rory Gilmore
Scott Patterson as Luke Danes
Melissa McCarthy as Sookie St. James
Liza Weil as Paris Geller
Sean Gunn as Kirk Gleason
Matt Czuchry as Logan Huntzberger
and Kelly Bishop as Emily Gilmore
special appearance by
Edward Herrmann as Richard Gilmore

Supporting cast

Sally Struthers as Babette Dell
Liz Torres as Miss Patty

Recurring cast

Danny Strong as Doyle McMaster
Kathleen Wilhoite as Liz Danes
Michael DeLuise as T.J.

Guest stars

Gregg Henry as Mitchum Huntzberger


I've been Huntzbergered


  • Michel and Lane do not appear in this episode.
  • In this episode we learn that Emily attended Smith College.

Show references


Lorelai – I was upset. I was standing by the magazines. I didn't want him to think I was verklempt over Nicole Richie
Lorelai – This house is a giant Skinner box with Chippendale chairs.
Emily – Yes. I can offer you a Shirley Temple or Roy Rogers.
Rory – I'll have a Roy Rogers.
Lorelai – Why not a Howdy Doody or a Captain Kangaroo?
Emily – The idea that two grown men hitting a tiny ball with metal sticks is the equivalent of Hamlet – ridiculous. But can I say anything? No! Because I can't agitate him.
Lorelai – It is ridiculous. Golf is more like Richard III. You know they're all hunched over. 
Lorelai – I’m not leering at… mother, are you on peyote?
Mitchum – You know what you should read? Philip Meyer’s latest book…
RoryThe Vanishing Newspaper. I read it. I loved it.
Lorelai – Wow, it’s a regular speakeasy.
Lorelai – Yes. Oh, I woke up this morning, and I've got to say, for the first time in my life, I got where the teetotalers are coming from. If I had a hatchet and a barrel of booze, forget about it.